I guess you can call me a college girl or something... because that's exactly what I am. I moved out last Thursday and have been here ever since! But actually, that's not quite true because I went home Saturday all day and came home Sunday morning. And then I went home yesterday morning and came back this morning. So really, I haven't even spent much time here... but I will! And so far I absolutely love it. I've met tons of great people, my roommates are seriously awesome (I for sure lucked out) and classes aren't too bad.. so far. Don't worry, I've already done like 3 hours of homework today. College is definitely a ton more work than high school (obviously...). But I think it's going to be way more fun. It is so far!
I'm way excited to see where I go the next few years. I know that I'm going to change so much and I'm kinda anxious to see what happens. I'm beginning college as a newly 18 year old and I'll end as a 22, 23 year old. Maybe married, maybe not. I'm sure my opinions will change, I'll grow up and learn new things. I can't wait to see what happens. I've watched older siblings change so much during college. Definitely for the better. They grew up and learned more about the world around them. I hope that the same things happen to me.
Life is moving kinda fast, but I'm enjoying every second of it.
mechale lauren
8.21.2012
6.02.2012
New Day
Two posts in two days? That's pretty dang good for me! But I needed to finish up some thoughts from the last post.
Last night was one of the best nights of my entire life. It was the all night party. It was just straight up fun. There were blow up slides, obstacle courses, bounce house, photo booth, aeroball, a cash cube (I won $10... haha yesssss), ukelele instruction, scooters, ping pong, racquetball, manicure station, hair cuts, massages, rifle and golf simulators, FOOOODDDD.. games, and best of all- some of my very best friends. I spent time with so many random people! It was wonderful. I completed dares, signed meaningful messages in yearbooks, lounged, laughed, got super loopy, watched rap battles, boys waxing random body parts, danced my heart out, saw some stupid human tricks, played in the sand by the volcano (don't ask), ya know. Basically had the best night of my life. And no, I never once fell asleep I was strong from 8 am Friday until 8 am Saturday:) that's the first 24 hours I've ever gone without a single wink of sleep. I have to say though that the best part of the night occurred at about 6:30 in the morning. The party ended at 5 but me and a bunch of friends hung around to help clean up. We then all got talking and realized that we'd never been up to the roof! So what did we do? We went up there. I wish that I could describe the magic of the moment. It was possibly the most beautiful thing I've ever had the pleasure of witnessing. The entire sky (not just the east side) was lit up with pinks and oranges as the sun began is ascent into the sky. It was awe inspiring and breathtaking. I can't think of a better way to end my high school experience. I wish the pictures we took would do it justice. But it simply cannot. I was so inspired.
Then we went up to Alec's before going to breakfast at 7. But here's the thing, Madi, Nicole and I ended up just sleeping in Nicole's car until everyone else got back. It was sort of a bizarre situation but it was fun. I was dead asleep in the middle of the road at first and then they woke me up and made me get in the car. We were out cold when other people got back. Addy, Tanner and Duke found us first and jumped into the back seat on top of Madi. Then Alec heard a commotion outside his house and so decided to join us by laying across Nicole and I. It honestly was so fun. We were in there for almost an hour just talking. Tons of Alec's neighbors walked by and gave us some pretty good looks.. It was so funny. Finally, they all left and so Madi, Nicole and I went down to Nicole's for breakfast and then we slept from 10 until 3. My internal clock is so off right now.
Before we went our separate ways (for a little while at least) we made a summer bucket list. I must say- it's going to be a great summer. I am so excited. Graduation has been an incredible thing. It's still completely surreal that I'm actually done with BHS, but I can't wait for what the future holds.
I started my senior year with a sunrise with all the seniors marking the beginning of a new year. We ended on Wednesday with a sunset signaling the close of an incredible era. Starting this morning- the first of my life after high school- with a magnificent sunrise was awe inspiring. Some of the best years of my life haven't even happened yet. I look forward to them and whatever life has in store for me with hope.
mechale lauren
Last night was one of the best nights of my entire life. It was the all night party. It was just straight up fun. There were blow up slides, obstacle courses, bounce house, photo booth, aeroball, a cash cube (I won $10... haha yesssss), ukelele instruction, scooters, ping pong, racquetball, manicure station, hair cuts, massages, rifle and golf simulators, FOOOODDDD.. games, and best of all- some of my very best friends. I spent time with so many random people! It was wonderful. I completed dares, signed meaningful messages in yearbooks, lounged, laughed, got super loopy, watched rap battles, boys waxing random body parts, danced my heart out, saw some stupid human tricks, played in the sand by the volcano (don't ask), ya know. Basically had the best night of my life. And no, I never once fell asleep I was strong from 8 am Friday until 8 am Saturday:) that's the first 24 hours I've ever gone without a single wink of sleep. I have to say though that the best part of the night occurred at about 6:30 in the morning. The party ended at 5 but me and a bunch of friends hung around to help clean up. We then all got talking and realized that we'd never been up to the roof! So what did we do? We went up there. I wish that I could describe the magic of the moment. It was possibly the most beautiful thing I've ever had the pleasure of witnessing. The entire sky (not just the east side) was lit up with pinks and oranges as the sun began is ascent into the sky. It was awe inspiring and breathtaking. I can't think of a better way to end my high school experience. I wish the pictures we took would do it justice. But it simply cannot. I was so inspired.
Then we went up to Alec's before going to breakfast at 7. But here's the thing, Madi, Nicole and I ended up just sleeping in Nicole's car until everyone else got back. It was sort of a bizarre situation but it was fun. I was dead asleep in the middle of the road at first and then they woke me up and made me get in the car. We were out cold when other people got back. Addy, Tanner and Duke found us first and jumped into the back seat on top of Madi. Then Alec heard a commotion outside his house and so decided to join us by laying across Nicole and I. It honestly was so fun. We were in there for almost an hour just talking. Tons of Alec's neighbors walked by and gave us some pretty good looks.. It was so funny. Finally, they all left and so Madi, Nicole and I went down to Nicole's for breakfast and then we slept from 10 until 3. My internal clock is so off right now.
Before we went our separate ways (for a little while at least) we made a summer bucket list. I must say- it's going to be a great summer. I am so excited. Graduation has been an incredible thing. It's still completely surreal that I'm actually done with BHS, but I can't wait for what the future holds.
I started my senior year with a sunrise with all the seniors marking the beginning of a new year. We ended on Wednesday with a sunset signaling the close of an incredible era. Starting this morning- the first of my life after high school- with a magnificent sunrise was awe inspiring. Some of the best years of my life haven't even happened yet. I look forward to them and whatever life has in store for me with hope.
mechale lauren
6.01.2012
Long Live
I just graduated. It's been 13 long years! I'm not entirely sure how I feel. I figured I had better get my thoughts, however scattered they may be, down while I'm still in the moment. So there's this song by Taylor Swift called "Long Live" and I can't even count how many times I've listened to it this week. It's pretty well describes my feelings of graduation.
My senior year has been the absolute best year of my life to date. I have been an SBO officer- a dream since 5th grade. I've made incredible friendships. I had my first kiss. I've had more sleepovers this year than I've had in my entire life! I've spent nights home sad. I've partied with the best of them. I grew up more than I thought I would. I received multiple presidential scholarships to universities including the Thomas S. Monson Scholarship to BYU (which I'm not taking). I've learned how to be myself. I grew into my identity. I gained 26 new siblings and an incredible adopted mom. I rekindled old friendships. Things changed. I learned to believe.
Now here I am. I switched my tassel from the right to the left signaling the end of a decade and the start of an age. I'm definitely sad. I've cried my fair share. I'm not sad to grow up, I'm sad to know that my time at BHS is over and that things will never be the same. (Wow. why the heck am I crying?) I loved high school. It was hard and dramatic and stressful and there were definitely times I couldn't wait for today. Now that it's here, though, it's hard to see it go.
When in my life is there going to be another year that I devote my life to a cause greater than myself (besides being a mother.. that's totally different)? I learned to believe in a student body of 1446 students. I learned that I can do a lot, I can be significant. I learned how to work with others to accomplish a goal. Looking back I find that the most rewarding moments of this past year all occurred when I was doing something student gov related whether it be decorating the school on Saturday mornings or lighting the B or painting/sleeping on the football field or riding on the bus to away games or having a poorly attended movie night or an incredibly successful spirit bowl (here comes an extremely long aside- Spirit Bowl is definitely one of the highlights of my entire year. Alec and I worked our butts off for it starting in December. When the bowl rolled around in April it was incredible. Everything worked flawlessly, our time couldn't have been more perfect, everything went smoothly, the seniors won fair and square. It was perfect. All of my expectations were exceeded. I have to give a lot of the credit to Alec- he definitely did so much to logistically make it work. Ahh, I loved Spirit Bowl. All that hard work totally paid off) or dances or hellish meetings where we don't agree or going to tennis, soccer, volleyball, basketball, wrestling, softball, baseball, concerts, plays to support fellow Braves or sleeping on Vickie's lawn. The officers truly have become like family to me. In fact, I spent more time with them this year than I did with the majority, if not all, of my blood siblings. I love them.
We were the kings and the queens
You held your head like a hero
I said, remember this feeling
We are the kings and the queens
And the cynics were outraged
Long live the walls we crashed through
And you take a moment
It's hard knowing that things are ending. I guess you could say it's really a beginning but I'm not in the mood. I'd rather feel nostalgic and reminisce on the incredible time's I've had. I truly have been so blessed to grow up where I do. I wouldn't at all be surprised if I end up being one of those people who comes back to Bountiful to raise a family. It's a special place. I love b-town. The two times I cried in graduation were when we(the choir) sang Omnia Sol, a song that embodies graduation, and when we sang the school song. I sobbed! How pathetic is that? But I couldn't help it. BHS has been a part of my life since birth, thanks to my dad working there. I'm so glad I have an excuse to come back to basketball games without being a lame Super Senior. I love Bountiful High School.
BHS has been a place where I learned so much about myself. What I want in life, the kinds of friends to keep close, how to love- in many ways. It's been a place where I feel safe. I'll be completely candid- this year has been hard. I felt deserted by my best friends of three years. In the beginning I hoped that this year would be one that was different from all others in that I would learn how to be myself and not rely on friends as much. At first, it felt like that wasn't going to happen. I was so hurt and frustrated and angry and I felt betrayed. Then I had to learn how to live on my own. How to get to know other people. Right now I wouldn't say that I belong to one specific group but rather I have learned how to get along with many people and reach outside the bounds of my supposed friend group. If you told me the names of the people I now consider my best friends at the beginning of the year I would have only believed one of them would be. My hope that I would come into my own this year has definitely been realized. I have gained so much confidence. I no longer hide behind friends or academics. I have learned to live. Long live.
I'm interested to see where life after graduation will take the BHS class of 2012. I can't wait to see who I still stay friends with. This week has been one of the best of my life. Bravestock was so fun. Then came Swansong and Senior Sunset. Last night we had the classiest banquet of all time and today we graduated. Tonight it'll all be capped off with the all-night party. The class of 2012 is classy. Over this week, my love and amazement of my class has tripled. I love each and every one of them. It's so sad to let go.
I'm moving on. I have my diploma. I'll never take another class at BHS again. But that's okay. I've had a great run. Sure, there are some things I would change, but overall I wouldn't give up my experience for anything. YOLO. How many times I've heard that acronym this week I could never say, but as stupid and cheesy and ridiculous as it is, it's true- You only live once. So learn to live. Live in the moment. Don't think- do. Because you'll never get that moment back. These past three years have been one's I'll never forget. I'll never forget the lessons I've learned. I'll never forget late nights scrambling to maintain my 4.0. I'll never forget getting plowed over playing football. I'll never forget drives and conversations. I'll never forget the people I've learned to love. I'll never forget to believe.
Once a Brave, Always a Brave
mechale lauren
My senior year has been the absolute best year of my life to date. I have been an SBO officer- a dream since 5th grade. I've made incredible friendships. I had my first kiss. I've had more sleepovers this year than I've had in my entire life! I've spent nights home sad. I've partied with the best of them. I grew up more than I thought I would. I received multiple presidential scholarships to universities including the Thomas S. Monson Scholarship to BYU (which I'm not taking). I've learned how to be myself. I grew into my identity. I gained 26 new siblings and an incredible adopted mom. I rekindled old friendships. Things changed. I learned to believe.
Now here I am. I switched my tassel from the right to the left signaling the end of a decade and the start of an age. I'm definitely sad. I've cried my fair share. I'm not sad to grow up, I'm sad to know that my time at BHS is over and that things will never be the same. (Wow. why the heck am I crying?) I loved high school. It was hard and dramatic and stressful and there were definitely times I couldn't wait for today. Now that it's here, though, it's hard to see it go.
When in my life is there going to be another year that I devote my life to a cause greater than myself (besides being a mother.. that's totally different)? I learned to believe in a student body of 1446 students. I learned that I can do a lot, I can be significant. I learned how to work with others to accomplish a goal. Looking back I find that the most rewarding moments of this past year all occurred when I was doing something student gov related whether it be decorating the school on Saturday mornings or lighting the B or painting/sleeping on the football field or riding on the bus to away games or having a poorly attended movie night or an incredibly successful spirit bowl (here comes an extremely long aside- Spirit Bowl is definitely one of the highlights of my entire year. Alec and I worked our butts off for it starting in December. When the bowl rolled around in April it was incredible. Everything worked flawlessly, our time couldn't have been more perfect, everything went smoothly, the seniors won fair and square. It was perfect. All of my expectations were exceeded. I have to give a lot of the credit to Alec- he definitely did so much to logistically make it work. Ahh, I loved Spirit Bowl. All that hard work totally paid off) or dances or hellish meetings where we don't agree or going to tennis, soccer, volleyball, basketball, wrestling, softball, baseball, concerts, plays to support fellow Braves or sleeping on Vickie's lawn. The officers truly have become like family to me. In fact, I spent more time with them this year than I did with the majority, if not all, of my blood siblings. I love them.
I still remember this moment
In the back of my mind
The time we stood with our shaking hands
The crowds in stands went wild
We were the kings and the queens
And they read off our names
The night you danced like you knew our lives
Would never be the same
You held your head like a hero
On a history book page
It was the end of a decade
But the start of an age
Long live the walls we crashed through
While the kingdom lights shined just for me and you
I was screaming, long live all the magic we made
And bring on all the pretenders, one day we will be remembered
I said, remember this feeling
I passed the pictures around
Of all the years that we stood there on the sidelines
Wishing for right now
We are the kings and the queens
You traded your baseball cap for a crown
When they gave us our trophies
And we held them up for our town
And the cynics were outraged
Screaming, this is absurd
'Cause for a moment a band of thieves
In ripped-up jeans got to rule the world
Long live the walls we crashed through
While the kingdom lights shined just for me and you
I was screaming, long live all the magic we made
And bring on all the pretenders, I'm not afraid
Long live all the mountains we moved
Long live all the mountains we moved
I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you
I was screaming, long live the look on your face
And bring on all the pretenders, one day we will be remembered
Hold on to spinning around
Confetti falls to the ground
May these memories break our fall
And you take a moment
Promise me this
That you'll stand by me forever
But if God forbid fate should step in
And force us into a goodbye
And force us into a goodbye
If you have children someday
When they point to the pictures
Please tell them my name
Tell them how the crowds went wild
Tell them how I hope they shine
Long live the walls we crashed through
I had the time of my life with you
Long, long live the walls we crashed through
Long, long live the walls we crashed through
All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you
And I was screaming, long live all the magic we made
And bring on all the pretenders, I'm not afraid
Singing, long live all the mountains we moved
Singing, long live all the mountains we moved
I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you
And long, long live the look on your face
And bring on all the pretenders, one day we will be remembered
It's hard knowing that things are ending. I guess you could say it's really a beginning but I'm not in the mood. I'd rather feel nostalgic and reminisce on the incredible time's I've had. I truly have been so blessed to grow up where I do. I wouldn't at all be surprised if I end up being one of those people who comes back to Bountiful to raise a family. It's a special place. I love b-town. The two times I cried in graduation were when we(the choir) sang Omnia Sol, a song that embodies graduation, and when we sang the school song. I sobbed! How pathetic is that? But I couldn't help it. BHS has been a part of my life since birth, thanks to my dad working there. I'm so glad I have an excuse to come back to basketball games without being a lame Super Senior. I love Bountiful High School.
BHS has been a place where I learned so much about myself. What I want in life, the kinds of friends to keep close, how to love- in many ways. It's been a place where I feel safe. I'll be completely candid- this year has been hard. I felt deserted by my best friends of three years. In the beginning I hoped that this year would be one that was different from all others in that I would learn how to be myself and not rely on friends as much. At first, it felt like that wasn't going to happen. I was so hurt and frustrated and angry and I felt betrayed. Then I had to learn how to live on my own. How to get to know other people. Right now I wouldn't say that I belong to one specific group but rather I have learned how to get along with many people and reach outside the bounds of my supposed friend group. If you told me the names of the people I now consider my best friends at the beginning of the year I would have only believed one of them would be. My hope that I would come into my own this year has definitely been realized. I have gained so much confidence. I no longer hide behind friends or academics. I have learned to live. Long live.
I'm interested to see where life after graduation will take the BHS class of 2012. I can't wait to see who I still stay friends with. This week has been one of the best of my life. Bravestock was so fun. Then came Swansong and Senior Sunset. Last night we had the classiest banquet of all time and today we graduated. Tonight it'll all be capped off with the all-night party. The class of 2012 is classy. Over this week, my love and amazement of my class has tripled. I love each and every one of them. It's so sad to let go.
I'm moving on. I have my diploma. I'll never take another class at BHS again. But that's okay. I've had a great run. Sure, there are some things I would change, but overall I wouldn't give up my experience for anything. YOLO. How many times I've heard that acronym this week I could never say, but as stupid and cheesy and ridiculous as it is, it's true- You only live once. So learn to live. Live in the moment. Don't think- do. Because you'll never get that moment back. These past three years have been one's I'll never forget. I'll never forget the lessons I've learned. I'll never forget late nights scrambling to maintain my 4.0. I'll never forget getting plowed over playing football. I'll never forget drives and conversations. I'll never forget the people I've learned to love. I'll never forget to believe.
Once a Brave, Always a Brave
mechale lauren
5.09.2012
Apparently I'm way into graphic quote things as of late. I saw this today and it fit in perfectly with what I've been thinking about all day. Today at flute I had to improv on the repeats of a couple Bach and Handel menuettos. I hated it. I'm always follow the book! If someone gives me a specific task, I'll follow it completely. Tell me extremely vaguely and leave it up to me, I'll struggle. I've never considered myself an extremely creative person. I worry too much about what people think and how they'll react to what I say. I never ask questions in class. I keep my opinions to myself. I 'm an all around people-pleaser. And that's something I want to change about myself. I fear what others might say or that they might judge me if I'm wrong so I stay quiet. By why? That's no way to live. I want to live a creative life! So I need to get over my fear of being wrong. I feel like I'm the "smart girl" and I hate it. I feel like when I don't get the high on a test or whatever, everyone around me freaks out. On every stats, psych and English test this year I'm always asked. "What did you get." If it was the high, people freak out that I ruin the curve. If I didn't do as well, they rejoice that "I beat Mechale!". I'm not perfect! I make mistakes too. And it drives me insane that people measure up to me. Honestly, I'm sure that sounds conceited, but I promise, its not. I absolutely hate it. So I think that this is where my fear of being wrong stems from. It honestly hurts that when I mess up or someone beats me that they act like its a huge deal. I'm fine if someone gets a score better than me. That's great! But its when it turns into "Mechale didn't do very well, even I beat her! What the heck?" that it hurts. This sounds all wrong, I can't explain it. But this blog really is for me and my catharsis so whatever. I just want to be fine with being wrong. I can handle being wrong, but its the fact that if I'm wrong someone says something to make a big deal out of it that is frustrating. And now I'm rambling. But moral of the story- I want to live a creative and spontaneous life but I feel like I'm held back by judgements I suppose others are making. Which is no way to live. Now that I recognize it, though, I can change it. I don't need to be afraid of making a mistake.
4.18.2012
Expectations
I've been thinking a ton about growing up and moving on. I think I'm ready. I'm ready to finally take my life into my own hands. No one to give me a schedule, no one to wake me up in the morning or make me food. No one to push me to do something. Only me. I can't wait. High school is incredible and I love it but I am more than ready to get away from it all. Yes, I'll be insanely distraught when the year is over and I have to leave my second family, but it's okay. I'm moving on and making my life my own. I have housing, I have roommates, I have orientation, I have scholarships, I got my FAFSA award yesterday. It's all happening and I couldn't be more anxious.
I couldn't be more anxious to leave home, to live my life for me. My parents will no longer loom over me.
I'll live and love and learn for me.
My life is my gift and it's time it becomes mine.
I want to be responsible and accountable to myself, not my parents, not my teachers, not adults in my life who expect things.
I want to be the one with the big, big plans.
I want to be the one with the big, big plans for myself and my life. because I want to make something incredible of my life. Not because someone expects it.
I expect it.
mechale lauren
1.13.2012
Beauty and the Beast
I just so happen to be a big fan of Beauty and the Beast. It also just so happens that Bountiful did Beauty and the Beast this year. I went Monday, Thursday and Saturday matinee. And, yes, I could have seen it more. I loved it! I have never wished so bad that I had done musical.. sigh.. I'll just enjoy the shows:)
So.. Thursday when I went I wore my belle dress. Colton (the beast) told me to wear it and I promised I would. So.. I wore it. Yes, little girls came up to me before the show to just say hi. I wore my sweater to detract from exactly this attention but, alas, that failed. Oh well, it was fun! I'll take any excuse to wear that dress. I'm obsessed. Because I wore it Colton told me I could get my picture with him so here we are-
Chelsea (Belle) was fabulous!! Her voice is so incredible. loved it.
Ahh. The best picture of the night:) Beauty and the Beast
mechale lauren
So.. Thursday when I went I wore my belle dress. Colton (the beast) told me to wear it and I promised I would. So.. I wore it. Yes, little girls came up to me before the show to just say hi. I wore my sweater to detract from exactly this attention but, alas, that failed. Oh well, it was fun! I'll take any excuse to wear that dress. I'm obsessed. Because I wore it Colton told me I could get my picture with him so here we are-
Chelsea (Belle) was fabulous!! Her voice is so incredible. loved it.
Ahh. The best picture of the night:) Beauty and the Beast
mechale lauren
1.10.2012
Just for Today
Lets face it. I'm completely overwhelmed. I'm so ready for this week to be over. But I have to keep reminding myself to just take it a day at a time and remember the sage advice from an Ann Lander column. Just For Today-
And allow me to add- Just for today I will take a deep breath and realize that I can do it.
mechale lauren
Just for today I will live through the next 12 hours and not tackle my whole life's problems at once.
Just for today I will improve my mind. I will learn something useful. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.
Just for today I will be agreeable, I will look my best, speak in a well-modulated voice, be courteous and considerate.
Just for today I will not find fault with friend, relative or colleague. I will not try to change or improve anyone but myself.
Just for today I will have a program. I might not follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will save myself from two enemies — hurry and indecision.
Just for today I will exercise my character in three ways. I will do a good turn and keep it a secret. If anyone finds out, it won't count.
Just for today I will do two things I don't want to do, just for exercise.
Just for today I will be unafraid. Especially will I be unafraid to enjoy what is beautiful and believe that as I give to the world, the world will give to me.
And allow me to add- Just for today I will take a deep breath and realize that I can do it.
mechale lauren
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